Get ready to understand the untapped potential of your brain! Join Jess as she gets cozy with the esteemed Dr. Lynn from Brain Balance.
First up? Executive functioning. Dr. Lynn breaks it down in a way that'll make you go, "Ah, so that's why I forget my keys sometimes!" They chat about how our brain handles everything from tying our shoes to tackling big life decisions.
Now, ever heard some wild stories about ADHD? Dr. Lynn's here to set the record straight. She dives into what it really means, especially for kiddos, and why understanding this can change the game for so many people out there.
There’s laughter, insights, and some "aha!" moments that'll make you see things in a whole new light.
So grab your favorite drink, get comfy, and let's dive into this brainy chat together!
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Website: https://www.sincerelyfutureyou.com
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*This Transcript is Autogenerated*
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 0:00
Isn't it hilarious that AD D is most commonly find in entrepreneurs that we nickname chief executive officers. I mean, I just chuckling as you were saying this I was like, these executive functioning is like what it takes to be a CEO what it takes to be a woman especially who is in a lot of cases not just managing the executive functioning of her business and what it takes to run her business in the day but of her family or of her household or of you know, the extended relationships that community Welcome to sincerely future you a podcast that helps ambitious women like you make decisions today with the future you in mind. Hello, welcome back. We have the best episode ever. I really think that I can say that without overhyping it. I am so excited to have this guest on for you. Because Dr. Lynn Manson le owner of Brain Balance in plain view is someone who is in a very short period of time, not only changed my life, and but my son's life and our family's life, and she's about to rock your world get ready. It's time to get hype. Last week, I did something that I've never done before. And there is no sentence that brings me more joy. Right? I did something that I've never done before. This is the essence of what this show is about right? Connecting with our future selves, that version of us who's doing things and is something that we are not yet. I love to set a pace for myself and then break that rhythm. I love to evolve to raise my standards expand what's possible for me and create a new normal. Last week, I ran 43.5 miles in 12 days. And I say last week, right? I completed a 12 day challenge last week. And the way this came about is such an easy and fun way to meet future you I wanted to share it. My husband who presently identifies as a runner, because he's completed a marathon half marathons, etc. Innocently said, I'm doing this fun challenge with his buddy Mike 12 ks of Christmas, you should do it with me. And I was like, oh, that sounds fun, mostly because of the cute hashtag and very little to do with me thinking through what I was actually saying yes to the challenge is to run 1k 2k 3k and so on until 12k consecutively, totaling 70k, which equals 43 and a half miles. These are some things I didn't consider when I said yes to this. It is winter in New York. This type of challenge means I have to do it no matter if it's raining or snowing or Sharknado snowing, hashtag blast. We didn't have that misfortune. But if it's windy AF and it was all of those other things. Other things I didn't consider I have a baby, and I don't have everyday childcare. Other life Life Events landed during these 12 days including my son's birthday. My son's birthday party business networking events, I had committed to one on one week for the masterful CEO school, which meant my week was stacked with one on one sessions, which I don't typically do so I typically have a very flexible schedule didn't this week, and my family visited from Miami. I also had a holiday concert that I did not have this on the schedule and had to accommodate that as well. Also, something I didn't even put in my notes was I decided to for fun do a different 12 K's of Christmas challenge where I was doing 12 K's of Christian Christmas fashion a district edition. So that mean I committed to running and then also looking really nice in the same day every day for 12 days. Something I didn't consider was that on the 10k day my brother was running a Last Man Standing race in which they run 4.17 miles every hour for as long as they could until they literally cannot run any longer. And he would proceed to run 46 plus miles in one day. Making my feet which I thought was super awesome. comparatively much less glorious, especially to my already Ironman triathlete mom and seven minute mile running dad. And you know what? I am so glad I didn't consider any of these things. One of the biggest mistakes I see you guys making in trying to methodically transformed into your dream future self is overthinking transformative decisions. If you try to think about how you're going to do something big before you're committed to doing it. You're going to stop. You're going to feel overwhelmed. You're going to trap yourself in the minutia when the reality of the how, when you ask actual future you who's done it is usually some version of well, it wasn't pretty, but we figured it out. One of the days, my sneakers were wet from the previous day's run, so I ran in damp shoes on the last day mark and I needed to run at the same time. And we had our seven teen month daughter with us. Oh, but it was 31 degrees. So we just alternated running and walking down the street with her for the first 6k until she was crying to go in. And then we both had to finish the run later in the afternoon. Your big business is going to look a whole lot like a small business until you're willing to commit to things that scare you without overthinking them. It'll look like making offers during naptime, saying yes to a speaking gig when you're not yet good at public speaking, hiring your first virtual assistant before you know if you can afford them long term, or investing in a coach even when you have a lot on your plate. Knowing that you will not be able to control anything that comes your way but that you will be able to solve for all of it. That is all you need to know. Here is your mission today. Commit to an action challenge. Go live on tick tock for 30 days, make it offer every 30 days, start a podcast sign up for the splash pad today or reserve your seat in the March class of master will CEO school. Both can be done at future sincerely future you.com. But actually do it scared. Dr. Lin, thank you so much for being here. Thank
Dr. Lynn 6:45
you for having me. I'm very excited to talk to you and your the
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 6:49
heaps, the peeps I know Yes. And so just to give you some insight the people that listen to the show, they are women business owners, they are people who are pursuing a big life and a big business. And as we know anyone who is whether they're diagnosed or undiagnosed ADHD, that can feel like something that just really holds them back from having that big life. So Dr. Lin is an expert on all things having to do with hemisphere brain delays, why don't you actually do a little bit of an introduction to say what your expertise is. So that then we can go into specifics on ATD and ADHD.
Dr. Lynn 7:32
All right. So I am an expert at Dr. My lillo's method on how to balance the brain, I am not the creator of Brain Balance, I am literally a mom that took her child just like your boy to a Brain Balance to change his brain. So I could push his development where it needed to go instead of leaving it in a special ed IEP mode, and always having to accommodate for him. So I became an expert mom, and then an actual owner, CEO of a Brain Balance to help other moms and adults who have lived with this imbalance in their brain to be able to have a better functional brain and have the life that they want to have and are capable of having once their brain is much more organized. Yeah,
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 8:20
I think, honestly, we jumped in. And I should give a little bit of context as to how I came to meet you how I came to know you, which is that my son was there in all of the places that he was, whether it was in school, or in camp or in an extracurricular there were people saying, Oh, does he have ADD? Does he have ADHD, and I had never gotten him formally diagnosed, because to me, that type of diagnosis really just meant one of two things either. Number one, they were going to put him on an IEP, like you said and accommodate him with certain behavior plans, which I didn't feel like was working very well for him, because I felt like it was missing the root cause or number to put them on medication, which then again, was treating the symptoms, but was not there was no long term plan to get him off of Adderall or any other type of medication. So I was just looking for another solution pretty desperately and stumbled across actually an Instagram post of Kevin James and sure enough, Kevin James, who I ran into it was one of those serendipitous stories. I ran into him at a Coralife eatery and was like, oh, that's Kevin James. It's my hometown. What is he doing here? For those of you who don't know, Kevin James is he's an actor. He was in the movie hitch. He's been in a ton of tons of King of Queens. The TV show. Yeah. And he was was there and I was like, that's weird. What's he doing in Garden City? And then a week later, I get an answer. stir gram, add or not add post in my feed of Kevin James talking about his kids going to this place called Brain Balance. And I was like, what's that? And I looked into it and I was like, Wow, this sounds like exactly the missing piece to what I've been searching for. And I found Dr. Molly Lowe's book disconnected kids, and then brought him to meet you. And since meeting you, I just have felt in such good hands. So you said that you had a similar experience to me, right? You were like looking for this thing that didn't seem to exist in the school systems. And you were like, I, I need to go to this place. And at the time, you were driving to Connecticut, I think. Yes. Yeah. And, and you were like, I need to open one of these centers. So since then, tell us fast forward, you've opened a Brain Balance Center. And who do you work with? Exactly. And what do you what? What is the offer? What is the what are the results that people come to get when they come to Brain Balance?
Dr. Lynn 11:04
Great question. So I like you were searching for things to do for my child to push us development that wasn't school related. Because the OT PT speech, smaller classroom behavioral plan model was not correcting the underlying cause of why he couldn't regulate in a classroom or even at a camp or a birthday party, why his senses were overloading him and he wasn't able to manage and emotionally regulate. So I looked for again, Googling, Googling, in the middle of the night, like many, many moms were looking for the answer of okay, what exactly is emotional regulation in the brain? What is sensory processing? So just these words being thrown at me at school meetings, or the nursery school teacher? Oh, yeah, sensory problems, I think. So what does that mean? I'm a chiropractor. So everything's natural healing for me hands on vitamins, foods. Okay, so where what's going on in his neurology that's causing that and just through one of my ways, the amount of my math research nights, I've ran into the disconnected kids book, and he answered every single question, he was my son in that book. I mean, every, every mom and dad, come into me, now say, That's my child, like, Thank God, this man did this and put it all together. And he really is such a genius, because he really just took all of the work that everybody is doing out there. Everybody's trying, the schools are trying so hard that I, you know, the IEP team, the speech therapists, occupational, everybody wants to get their child, these children off of their IEP, but they just don't have the right recipe. And Dr. Melillo really put the right recipe together to push brain function, almost like a stroke patient, like how you can push them into developing different skills, and in a very coordinated manner. So we all would be able to do it together as a team, the School, the home, and the doctor that you're going to that you know, to let them know, listen, this is what we're gonna be doing. We're not using medication, we're not using chemical intervention, we're using functional connection, intervention to strengthen the brain and make better tighter connections, just performance enhancement, and pushing them in the areas that need to be developed. And everybody I mean, so many, everybody gets better, like, so quick. It's really amazing. Within a year, the child has changed, the families changed. The school system sees the change, they're just like, like, you know, they think a little bit is what they're doing too. But I'm like, given that I was like, Yeah, you know, you accommodated them for a while. But thank you. But yeah, it's really the parent, it really worked hard at home. And it's also foods involved, too. So it's a lot of change in your lifestyle with at the dinner table at the breakfast table. Yeah,
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 13:39
I do know. And I just want to translate what you said, for our listeners, because I think it's so shocking when you hear you say it so nonchalant. And you're so in it and you see the proof every day of these kids going through functional exercises that strengthen whichever hemisphere of the brain and when we're talking about in this episode ATD and ADHD, we're talking about the right hemisphere of the brain having a delay, that is what creates the symptoms of a DD and ADHD amongst other things. And that you can functionally strengthen it so that the symptoms not only could go away literally disappear altogether. Right strengthens it. i And I needed to have you on the show because I feel like people think I'm taking crazy pills when I tell them. Okay, oh yeah, I know what you're talking about is so short term thinking. I'm interested in having Calvin no longer have ADHD and people are like, Whoa, he has it. So we know adults with ADHD he's just gonna always have it forever. And I was like, No, he will not because there are ways for you to functionally and I know legally I don't know we're allowed to say the word cure or fix but yes, strengthen the brain so that the symptoms go away. We're saying all The same things, right? And so how is this relevant to the listeners on our show? So many entrepreneurs. And I mean, maybe you could speak to this, why you find so many entrepreneurs in that have ADHD versus in other spaces. But they find themselves either undiagnosed or diagnosed ADHD. So when I said you were going to be on the show, they were like, tell me, let me ask her all these questions of how she can help me accommodate my ADHD brain to ask her questions about, you know, time management systems, or how I can practice or empower myself while I'm, you know, essentially living with this limitation in my brain. And what was so fascinating when I was sending you over the questions I was receiving is that so many of the questions were about accommodations, and you're like, Yeah, we're not going to answer any of those questions, because that's not what I do, right?
Dr. Lynn 16:01
That's exactly what I didn't want to do for my child is
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 16:04
exactly. And what was so striking for me is I was like, people are so unaware of this, this resource, this path that they are not, they don't even know what questions to ask. So amongst all of those questions, which are so well met, and which I totally get, and you were like, This is so funny, because these questions are ADHD, they're so ADHD, these questions, right. And I was like, it's amazing. It's amazing. We love them and right, I may or may not be undiagnosed ADHD, but what I have come to see is like, Oh, who cares? Right? Well, your brain is so flexible that now what do we do next? So I did get some really good questions, and I just want to dive into it. But before I do, is there anything else you want to say about business owners in being an adult with ADHD, that is different from kind of the work that you do with the kiddos.
Dr. Lynn 17:03
So there is no difference all than adults with ADHD is is a child that didn't have the mother or father or adult or teacher around them that found this information, you understand? So that's really what it is. So every every parent that comes in here, it says to me, Oh, my God, my son is me, my daughter is me. My mom just didn't know what to do. She just kept me on an IEP or in a resource room, or put me on Adderall or antidepressants. And she just didn't know she thought that that's what is out there. So all these CEOs, all these wonderful women that are, you know, had made it through. They're just children that didn't have the right accountant, not the combinations of right. Resources delivered to them through their adults in their world. Yes. So sometimes it's Grandma, I go out of Grandma's that call and I get, you know, like, Oh, my grandson's this. And I've had six kids. And nobody's, nobody's ever acted like that, can you? What do you guys do? I don't want to use medication. So it's really just what adult was in their world to actually find something like this. Almost like brain training is not what we do. But that's like real more of a word that people are used to hearing. Like, what is brain training, you know, it's tighten up your connections in your brain. So you have higher performance, and you're able to do everything that everybody can do and in normal and a normal way, without getting too much angst without getting too much overwhelm without everything piling up without losing your memory. And that's what a lot of the questions were their memory, they're remembering to finish a task, their ability to stay on task, having piles of everything, starting 15 different projects, and a lot of CEOs and owners are like that. They're, they're multitaskers, but they're not excellent at getting them all done. And being able to handle all that pressure and, and still manage your life and have, you know, love life and family life and self care. Like just a lot of things that life you can do if your brain is better connected, and you're not self medicating with either drugs, alcohol, sex, shopping, you know, there's all these little things, a collection of things, all these little things that they do to fill in those gaps. Yeah, I call that buffering,
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 19:23
right? Like avoiding experiencing what's truly there, that negative emotion and in this case, oftentimes, it's anxiety through another means of false pleasure. So I want to get right into it because you just landed on a couple of these things. And there's so many good questions in here. The first question was, what's the best educational content or resources you can recommend for learning about ADHD? How it shows up in your in your life and how you can optimize your life and brain for it. So I'm gonna translate right because obviously disconnected kids is the book that I read, but it really is Within the context of children, and even though the exercises at the end definitely can apply to adults, is there a different literature? Or do you recommend that one?
Dr. Lynn 20:10
No. So disconnected kids was written by Dr. Robert Melillo, He is the Creator. So it was written for parents so they can try to fix or at least get a really big jumpstart on the development and their homes. So it's, it's, it's a step by step of what the brain development is, which is, everybody Yeah. And even when you're an adult, that's how your brain got developed, and then how you actually strengthen those areas that are weakened development. So you can apply everything to the adult, the adult program, though, is a little more advanced, other than what's in the book, it's just, it's just the same concept, though, you're still working on increasing connectivity in the more immature hemisphere. So you have better connection between both sides of the brain. And there's more uniform speech going on between the two brain so it could function in all areas. So the disconnected kids book is very relevant for anybody, any, anybody that owns a brain, his research, if I were you, and the CEOs are out there listening, just go on Dr. Malolo research and just look at all of his research that he just came out with this year, a lot of it's on ADHD and the developing brain, autism in the developing brain, how hemisphere training can change the brain without a medical memory without medication intervention. So his research is another layer. Another route for SEO, you know, parent or may not woman right now who were talking to, to go into and dive into, but the book is still very relevant. And he is going to come up with it come out with another one. Very shortly, that's going to address more, because a lot of parents do say, you know, I wish it were there was no, there was an adult version. But it is even though the word kid is on the bus. Yeah.
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 21:55
And I would also say to stay in tune with Dr. Lin, because you're going to be writing a book soon as well. And whether or not I don't know whether it's fully going to be for parents or who it's going to be for but you know, this research, I just feel like it's so it's so I wasn't cutting edge. But like you said, it's been out there for so long. It's just finally in packaged in the right recipe to help people that aren't doctors be able to apply this work at home. So the good news is, even if you don't live in New York, you can take this book and you can use these exercises at home. So you do recommend the best one. Either the research or Dr. Robert Melillo disconnected
Dr. Lynn 22:39
kids is the name of the book. And he also wrote reconnected. So once you've gone through to Calvin, and eventually we'll be reading this once, when Calvin has graduated the program. It's reconnected now that the brain is all caught up just how you live the lifestyle for the next year. So with that new develop, child, I'm
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 22:56
so excited you guys were only a little over two months into the program. And already we've seen such incredible tangible results at home. And at school with Calvin, it's so exciting. So I can't wait to see what will happen when adults are applying this, oh, I need I need you all to like leave the reviews about this and give us give us your follow ups. So second question is I have major struggles with executive function as does my ADHD son, what are what are ways I can strengthen my skills as an adult and in turn empower him to do the same translation? Are there different functional practices for an adult than a child whose brain is still developing? So I think we had said, right, that there there aren't but can you kind of go a little bit more in depth into some of the types of or categories of what does it mean to functionally develop your brain? Like what type of things are we talking about?
Dr. Lynn 23:58
Right? So let me help them. So everything so with the question, I want to address their question because I feel bad that it's going to be we're going to be they're asking in English and we're talking to them in Japanese, right? So he does like what are you talking about? So if I give you Okay, so for executive functioning, let's give you an iPad and have lists all day long. So have a list here and a list there. We're always just have accommodations around. That's really what they're asking me. Right? That's what that's what that question is coming from. That's the answer she thinks that I'm gonna give her with the answer that I am going to give her that's going to help her the most is how do you fix your brain that cannot have that does not work. And the executive functioning piece is really interrupting your life. So primitive reflexes, core strength, auditory processing, vision, processing, smell processing, these are all things that we all have all day that that keep us alive as soon as we open our eyes in bed. You have you here You're up, who's walking around in the house, you smell who's cooking bacon, you feel who's laying next to me is my husband out of the bed, or am I laying upside down in the bed, you have a proprioceptive ability to know where your body is in space. These are all simple senses that our bodies have to allow us to function and take demands throughout the day. So brain balancing exercises, after the assessment is done, we're looking to see how each one of those pieces are talking to each other and at what speed they're coming in, and how we can then masterfully put all those pieces together to talk to each other. To have a beautifully running brain. You're going to have better emotional regulation, you're going to be able to do multitasking, you're going to have better memory, you're going to have better control of your body, you're going to have a more very, very high performing system. Yes. So executive functioning is one of those pieces. Yeah,
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 25:57
can you just define executive functioning for people who maybe have no clue what that means? Well,
Dr. Lynn 26:03
it's just like, let's do it for a child. Okay, guys, it's time to go to school. Let's get our shoes on our backpack. Let's make sure our water bottles in there. Let's make sure our code is in there. We have Jim today, like just managing what you have to do and in your moment, and remembering all the steps right executive who's the Executive, your brain and all the functions that have to happen. So all the pieces just that are life like we wake up, I gotta get out of my pajamas. I have to put my pajamas away or in the hamper. I'm gonna go brush my teeth wash my face, you know that every little thing is an executive functioning. It's basically how you're running your life and I have for task completion.
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 26:52
We want you on the show. In a few short weeks, we're going to be bringing in our 200th motherfreakin episode. What why I could cry as some of you have been with me for a long time like since the show was called the what's happening podcast anyone remember that? Others of you have popped on through the throughout the journey in the past three years, and you've helped shape the show with your feedback. But whether this is your first episode, hello, what up? Or your 196 you're about to experience a first we're going to be bringing your voice onto the show. I want you to email sincerely future you@gmail.com You're going to email a 30 to 100 and 22nd coaching question on anything related to time, money, CEO drama or future you work. Nothing is off limits people. Let's get weird. Get deep and specific to you and your business and vulnerable. The deadline for the submission is January 8. But do yourself a favor so you don't forget and just do it now. Record it right on your phone or your computer. Don't overthink it. Your only requirement is that we ask you have clear audio, no coffee shop backgrounds, and you email it on over all submissions will receive some fun sincerely future use swag. Because this is really special and important to me. I want this to be our most collaborative episode yet. Right after this episode, where you guys ask questions, we want to do more of this. And we want to feature the people who show up to the show. Isn't it hilarious that AD D is most commonly find in entrepreneurs that we nickname, chief executive officers. I mean, I just chuckling as you were saying this, I was like, these executive functions like what it takes to be a CEO what it takes to be a woman especially who is in a lot of cases, not just managing the executive functioning of her business and what it takes to run her business in the day. But of her family or of her household or of you know, the the extended relationships, the community, this school, if you have a kids or you know, your relationships with your parents and all of that, and how can you manage all of this what I see in my clients and I have a lot of clients that do have ADHD, they're just asking me like, how can how do we do it? All right. And I think that so much of the overwhelm comes from them feeling like well, I don't think that I can I don't think that my brain can handle this.
Dr. Lynn 29:37
So what they do is they hire really smart people around them to accommodate Oh, I have a great assistant, I have a great this or a great that which is, you know, awesome. I know that a lot of people do that. But again, I mean, it is great. Once you expand your business. I understand I do need staff. I'm not going to be able to run this whole place myself but you It's if they all just decided to quit today, could I still do everything and I could, and I know, you know, so. So there is you know that no, no accommodating, let's just organize your brain. So you can do all of that and, and have that ability, waiting, if you need it, if you're, if everybody else is gonna walk away from you,
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 30:22
I think that that's a real fear, right? It's like, oh, but I'm so dependent on this one person. And then we start making decisions in our business that maybe aren't the best, or were people pleasing our own employees, because we are scared that we won't be able to survive, our business wouldn't last without them. And so it doesn't mean don't hire good people. But what we're saying here is, while you're in the means of making your life easier through accommodations, then maybe you can be freed up to do some of this work that we're talking about right here where you can improve your brain, we're going to attack it from both sides and both angles until you can, you know, reduce and reduce the accommodations that you have to make. Right, which is what of course I'm doing with Calvin right now.
Dr. Lynn 31:07
Yes. So here in Brain Balance, we don't I don't diagnose so that you keep using that word, ADHD, and I know that all your listeners talk about that. Right. So ADHD, ADHD, autism, autism, right. Dyslexia, what what is it? So for all of you, that you think you have it, or you think you have a child that has it? What is it it's a list of symptoms that are getting in your way of everyday activities that we all do, but the brain that is not able to take in all those senses and all those demands, those sensory motor demands of the day, get overwhelmed, and have these behaviors show up. And that's impulsivity, hyperactivity, daydreaming, task avoidance, emotional dysregulation, so these are the actual symptoms. So Brain Balance, we, not everybody, in all the system has 88 centers, or doctors so they don't diagnose. It's not designed to be a diagnose, it's just showing you. These are the areas of your brain that aren't developed at the same speed. And let's get them talking to each other. So who let's not name it, let's just get rid of, or try to at least resolve and get it as tight as possible. Not maybe get rid of but some people you do with my son, I did. But everybody has a different layer of developmental delay. And some of them you won't actually get rid of completely, but it will just be much more manageable. So this
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 32:36
is yeah, so good. Because I can hear someone listening on the other end, but like, I don't know, I might diagnose should I maybe after listening to this episode, I should go and get see if I have ADHD and get diagnosed. So I can decide whether I want to do this or not. It's like, what a waste of your time actually just pick up the book, read it, see if you see yourselves in some of these examples. Because what I loved about the book is it flips back and forth between giving you a history of neurology, right understanding the science behind what's happening in your brain. And then, on top of it, giving examples of profiles of different in this case, children, right, but you can see the symptoms, you can see the behaviors. And if that sounds like you or not, or in some cases, right people who are listening, maybe your kids, and don't worry about going first to get a diagnosis. And I had actually a question come in because of the way that I phrased asking for the questions. I had a really lovely woman reach out saying, oh, and I have a big question for you, which is I want to I want to quote her because it was so beautifully written. She said, as with a lot of love and honesty who says ADHD label isn't empowering. A cancer diagnosis is also not empowering in and of itself. But if you don't get the diagnosis, then you can't take action. The same goes for ADHD first step is knowing and so many people who are brilliant, successful have ADHD, I think more we tiptoe around diagnosis and giving the label more is giving the label more stigma. What would you say to that?
Dr. Lynn 34:16
I saw that yeah, I love it. I know. So the it's just again, it's just the way if you see how everybody is struggling I mean, look at you how many times a phone call came in from his camp in his school. It's not fun to have ADHD. It's it's not you know, want a brain that can't attend and you're hyper and you're emotionally dysregulated and you can't finish tasks. You don't want to be like that. There's nothing empowering about it. Meaning like, Oh, I'm just gonna live with it. I'm amazing. I know Michael Jordan has it and Adam Levine has it and Miley Cyrus says, like you just have it like What do you mean? What does that mean? Like if you really get into it, what do you mean? Like nobody wants to have a brain that can't sit still that can't multitask. It gets overwhelmed in a large group of people that you can't pick up the just the daily tasks that everybody else can do. It's not a fun thing. I listened to the children, they tell me and the parents too. They say I'm so uncomfortable, my all my friends can finish their worksheets quicker, or they're going to gym. And I'm not because I can't get things done, or I can't sit still, I have to keep going to the bathroom. Nobody wants to feel like that. So again, getting a diagnosis in the medical fields. Yes, they're going to say, okay, maybe Adderall, maybe an antidepressant. They're going to say it, let's just make accommodations, let's do mindfulness. Let's do breathing. Let's do charts and, and vibrations that are going to remind you of the time that's all accommodating, great, if you want to go that way. I don't say not to I just say there's another way. If you want to do that, that's that's what you are into, and your life is gone that path, I'm not going to argue with you. By the time you've come to me, you would do not want to do that. You're coming into me and saying what do you got, because all that stuff never worked for me or my children, and I want something different. And I want I like the science behind this, I get it. This is me. This is my lifestyle. I want to change the food, I want to change the school, I want to change the daily activities that I give him, I want to not have so much device time in his life. I want not a lot of genetically modified and colored foods in his life I want or their life. I want to clean up my app, and really organize so empowering. Okay, I get it. Because yes, I do I get it because a lot of families, a lot of the poor boys, the fathers are very mean to the boys because they they don't even think that there's such thing is attention deficit hyperactivity or a weakness of the brain. They just think it's their behavior. They're lazy. Oh, my goodness. So I have to retrain the parent who comes here all smug with the moms the crying to say, do you understand? You know, let me just teach you a little neurology. I know, you know, you could be a bricklayer or you know, cut hair, and you have no idea, no background in medical, but I'm going to really make it simple. So you can understand this is how your brain developed. I'm going to show you, this is how your child's brain is developing. And it's not helpful to him for you screaming and hitting him. Yes, or yelling and telling him he's lazy. Um, so yes.
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 37:03
And I think that's the root of what she was getting to in her question, right? Which is like, what do you say to it can be empowering if finally, the kid or in this case, right, like an adult who's been living with this type of brain and was like unsure, right? Like, is there? Is it just me? Is there something wrong? Do I need to do anything? Am I just weak or softer need to suck it up or whatever? You know, the, the rhetoric was around them when they were growing up. And I know for me as well, it was kind of, you know, mind over matter. It was very much my, my dad certainly did was very authoritative. So if my behavior was the daydreaming or whatever, focus focus, that word was always in my house, focus, focus, focus, and I found myself wanting to do the same thing and tell my son, focus, focus, focus, and you're like, stop saying that. Right? Why? Right? Okay, so So why why not focus? And to her credit, right. I guess this also ties into the next question, which is, how do you communicate it to your friends or family or co workers or even employees? Right? How does it impact these relationships? And how does sharing neuro divergence with people in your life help or hurt you? So as an adult, I just find this question. So fascinating. I think you've helped me so much with the language and the strategies in terms of helping educate other parents or other adults around Calvin so that they kind of understand, hey, we've got this here. Like, there's nothing you need to worry about, and definitely discipline him in this way. Mm hmm.
Dr. Lynn 38:50
Well, that's, that's a very, very tough it'd be especially because you have if you have so much family and so many friends and so much like coaches around them, you really have to have emotionally intelligent people around them. And I am very tough on my families here. Because I was very tough with raising my son. I made sure that only emotionally intelligent human beings were going to be around him and that was his schools. That was his coach. That was his religion, teachers. That was my friends. That was the friends, his friends, parents, if, if they if he had cancer, everybody would know to treat him a certain way because he has a big tumor sticking off the top of his head and everybody's going to be Sark. Feel sorry for him. So that's how I used to try to frame Okay, listen, guys, you know, when people have a stroke, and their brain is not as strong Well, I'm fixing my son's brain I'm changing it so he can regulate but for right now, I got this. Don't you know, don't worry about it. I don't want you yelling at him doing anything and ever saying oh my god when I was a kid if he would have done that, you know, I would have gotten hit, right. You know, just you kind of have to educate everybody around you. But you have to really be a crazy Tiger Mom, I never even knew what the word Tiger Mom was I was I 41. By the time I had him, I just, my sister had four kids that she made it look so easy as they will typically developing. I had this little lion, literally. And I was like, Oh, my God, what is going on? It's gonna be so hard. I'm so good at so many things. Like, how come I can relate so deeply? So, um, I just had to be a, a very, I was always very pleasant, but very fierce. Advocate for him. And that's you have to learn to do and just everybody's doing
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 40:37
it for yourself, right? And when you're doing it as an adult and trying to, like, would you recommend if someone does want to go the route of the Mulilo method, and they want to, you know, balance their brain and start to train their brain and do these programs? My thought is, I don't really no, that it's that necessary to go around to letting everybody know that you're doing this just kind of committing to it, what would you say?
Dr. Lynn 41:03
I have? I have 55, cousins, aunts, uncles. I mean, they're just in my life in my face all the time. So I, I felt that I found this golden, like, Oh, my God, I found this thing that nobody knows. But I told that's what I'm doing. Yeah, like, I don't care. Like every teacher that was involved with him, every coach swim teacher, I was like, I'm retraining his brain, I'm growing his brain, I'm pushing his brain in ways that you'll never hear the word sensory processing problem from him in a couple of years. Because I'm actually getting rid of the sensory processing delay, I'm getting rid of the motor delay. I'm combining all of these skills and pushing his brain. So everybody around me couldn't stand hearing the word brain. And they still to this day, my husband, I am here with like, don't try not to say the word brain today. Let's hang out tonight. And don't use the word brain. So like, I just everybody loves it, though. Because no matter where I go, if I'm wearing this, I just went to the bank. Somebody just asked me 1000 questions about their grandson, I went to the dry cleaner, and like everybody has somebody that can improve their brain, whether it's them or they're the loved one. So everybody likes to talk about it, because they don't want to put a pill in it. They really don't. I don't even know. I don't even think the doctors at this point. They love they love finding this because they're like, oh my god, I'm not that I'm sick of writing the Adderall prescriptions, but I feel sick doing it for a six year old seven year old eight year old um, so this is interesting. Let me let me watch how this pans out. You know, they're, they don't dive right in the MTS, you know, because all my friends are MDS too. So they don't dive right in because they didn't learn it in school. So they just like oh, what is this gonna say and brought because Dr. Mullen was writing this research and backs me because I'm not writing it I'm like
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 42:46
so what would you recommend for an adult let's say that's listening that was diagnosed maybe younger and they are on medication but they're like very fascinated with this work. What is your take like? What is the process for someone who maybe does want to go off medication or was considering medication and they want to dive in with us? Is there a strategy or just kind of go all in
Dr. Lynn 43:07
No, I mean it's definitely educate yourself read the book give us a call she can take take a look at what this is just get educated read the research look at my profile look at all my you know just look at people who are doing this no matter where you are. There's 88 centers in the country and there is opportunity everywhere to change your brain so it's not like you have to stay in that on that path with the medication so nobody they've really nobody wants to if you didn't grow up in that way you just think taking an Advil for everything or you know taking a Tylenol or Benadryl is is your how you cure your body if you didn't grow up that way you don't want to put the chemical in your body nobody really wants to Yeah, especially with the child the parents and usually crying saying they feel guilty that they did it and they just don't know any different Yeah, and they really just didn't know any different they just think and and if you read Dr. Thomas I love Dr. Thomas Brown is a Yale PhD and he has this really great like explainer video about if you believe in like ADHD as just a we do right brain left brain and more right hemisphere weakness but he's an empty that doesn't have that knowledge so he talks about it as the pill will mask and accommodate your delays but it's not effects and he says that and it's so empowering because he's out there in the in the world with all the the Big Bang games, backings exactly like he's out there and I love that video so I gave it to all my kids. I
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 44:36
love that yes, but
Dr. Lynn 44:37
the sad thing about that video is always then he doesn't give them okay Guess what? No don't use medication but I don't have anything else for you just a life of accommodations. Right? So he doesn't know he doesn't say okay, go and Brain Balance your brain go find a Brain Balance. I do love Dr Halliwell. I want to give him a shout out because he's he's one of the famous psychiatrist in ADHD and the old school model of either medicating or accommodating. Again, finding your strengths. And I love him because he's such a happy, beautiful man. And he came here, he I met him through through the whole channel, learning about ADHD. And he came here and he was awesome. And he loved it. And he was just And he put it, he put me well, he put the Brain Balance centers. In his last book, he wrote 22 bucks, and he, after his visit here, and he's, you know, a Harvard trained psychiatrist, and he has ADHD himself. And he talks about how he never medicated himself. But he's, you know, he's definitely struggled through life with it. But he's has a very successful four practices, I think, in the United States, but he's another one that says, it's not all about medication. But it is still he's not saying balance your brain, right. You know, he did give a little shout out in the book, but it wasn't enough for my liking. But I'm glad I even got that far. But I'm gonna hit him up again. For me,
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 45:49
it's crazy. Because, right in the medical world, you're there's so much out there, right? I mean, it's so saturated with like, this research and that research. And when I found this program, my biggest skepticism about it was, if it is as good as they say it is, why isn't everybody doing this?
Dr. Lynn 46:10
And I think okay, so I'll let you answer that. Well, I
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 46:13
mean, I think the answer well, there's a couple of reasons. Number one, number one, it is because there is you're fighting the pharmaceutical companies, right? Adderall is one of the most prevalent drugs in the US. And we do know that there is obviously a, there would be a con to this going up that would go down. And there are a lot of, you know, well backed companies and people that would not like that to happen. Last cynical answer is just that this is a commitment. This program is no joke, this takes work. And if you're doing it with a child, it is the parents job, even if you do go to the Brain Balance centers, and you have one near you like I do, and I'm going three days a week, this is a seven days a week, where we are overwhelming the brain, like she said, so that the brain can start to talk to each other, like coordinate like a symphony, you always say and I just think it's so beautiful. And I found so many ways that I have trained my own brain to believe new things, right, different parts of the brain. But I've watched my brain change because of repetition of believing something new, then I created it in my reality. And the same thing applies here, right? The brain, the brain is so flexible, when you are willing to train it consistently. And I know that right? Now that I'm in it, I'm like, gosh, I could see how people would feel like this is way too much time it's too much work and or you know too much money if they couldn't do the work themselves. Or maybe they would have to take off work to be able to do that. So then they're losing money, I do understand how in our world, we can convince ourselves that it's not the priority when it is and so when you are a business owner, if you're considering this, and you get to see that there is this is something that is affecting you on a day to day basis. And you know, what you would be able to achieve if you had your executive functioning, running at a balanced level, you have to ask yourself, Am I willing to step off the bike to get into the car? Like you're pedaling like a mad person trying to keep up trying to accommodate yourself to reach your goals? Are you willing to kind of slow down and really make this a priority in order to be able to race down the road, in a car towards your goals and your life? And so the answer for me is definitely a yes. And I'm so grateful for you, I will ask you in one sentence or three sentences Max. Since we are always at the end, there were two questions that were really really specific. One was what triggers foods or substances like coffee, weed alcohol, others make a ATD or ADHD worse. I know for me, I was kind of surprised. I was like sugar for sure for Calvin, but I was surprised at the other things that you said. So what are what are those things to watch out for while you're balancing the brain?
Dr. Lynn 49:21
So it's just it's just brain fog to clear. Get anti inflammatory foods out of your body, right? Just Just give your brain a chance. So why put Skittles in your in your body and that has the detox all those chemicals and all that sugar. When you can put, you know, avocado salad or, you know, salmon or so it's just as you're building the brain you want to give the chemical fight that's inside your body. You know, you want to give your body the best chance with the chemicals that you're putting in it through natural means, you know, with foods, vitamins and minerals. It's a deeper kind conversation because it's based on the gut and based on the under development of the gut and how you detox foods and why some kids can just eat a blue lollipop and be fine. But the next kid with the bright brain deficit blows up, you know, in 10 minutes after they because they can't regulate all the sugar rush and all that.
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 50:18
Yeah, so obviously, right like Whole Foods, real foods. I know for Calvin, we had said dairy and gluten we are limiting to avoiding for an add brain, ADHD brain that were are the those are the foods that we're limiting right now. And then the other things they asked was, does white noise or a certain type of music help an ADHD brain focus? I thought that that was such an astute question. And there is kind of an answer.
Dr. Lynn 50:45
Well, there are certain tempos and certain beats and in the Brain Balance program, there are right brain sounds and left brain sounds. And so the answer is yes, there's there's certain sounds and auditory input that can calm your brain or bring it up. And that's one of the pieces of the program that we deliver to the children at home. And this is
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 51:09
so good. I had no clue right? That the the music that we were listening to and of course, once I looked at it, I was like, Yep, all the left brain music. That's the stuff that Calvin loves to listen to, right. It's just naturally like more rhythmic and more he loves that stuff. And the more the ballads, the the dissonant harmonies, the tones of the right brain, you know, he's less interested in which is why we have to listen to Dr. Yeah, less attracted to. So anyway, obviously, in terms of specific music, or specific nutrition programs, do your research after this episode, go and look up Brain Balance. Look up. Dr. Robert Melillo. And of course, look up Dr. Lin Metzen, le, so that you can get as much information we had over 30 questions. And of course, unfortunately, we're not going to be able to get to all of them. But I think the truth is, is that what I hope everyone takes away from this is that when you are thinking about your life, and your goals and your future, you are most likely trying to thinking about getting there with your current brain, and how much of your world and your life will open up if you are willing to Brain Train. And if you are willing to just take take this time, this brief time that could be as short as six months to a year obviously, depending on your your particular brain and what you're doing to train your brain to have it just move faster and more fluid and more connected. So thank you, Dr. Lane, where can people find you if they want to connect with you after this?
Dr. Lynn 52:50
Sure. So I'm in plain view on 1163 Old Country Road, and my number is 51682824280 Goodness,
Jessica McKinley Uyeno 53:00
you're gonna get an influx of phone calls, do not call Dr. Lin if you're not looking to get an assessment, just to ask her your ADHD questions, but she's brave given out her number. But thank you so much. And thank you for the work that you do, I really can't explain to you how I'm gonna get emotional, I can't explain to you how deeply lucky I feel for having stumbled upon this research and for having found you and for watching you speak to the school team and to just be an advocate for Calvin and for me and to speak to us our blended parent team over here and talk to us in the strong, firm direct way that you need to sometimes to make sure that we are staying, staying on task but beyond staying on task that we are prioritizing the right things and under sizing, understanding and empathizing with the fact that an AD D brain has certain limitations. And while he is still in the process of developing, you always say all change is good change. So when you are doing this work, expect that some changes might you know, things might look like they're going backwards when they're actually all of it is progress for you. So thank you. Thank you so much. And thanks for coming on the show. Welcome. All right, you guys have a beautiful thank you for having have a beautiful week. I think this might have been one of the most mind blowing episodes I've ever done on this show. Not just because I have so many clients and so many listeners who are either diagnosed or undiagnosed with ADHD, but because of the profound realization that while our society is you Still accommodating us, and manipulating all of the circumstances to help us have a better life. There is another route one that we have deeper control over. And that is changing our own brain, whether it's just your thoughts through mind management, or what we're talking about today with Dr. Lin, where you can functionally change and strengthen one hemisphere of your brain so that the symptoms that you should struggle with that keep you maybe in a position of feeling disadvantaged or handicapped. It keeps you on track towards that future version of you. Knowing this, I hope really opened you up and made you realize what is possible for you, not just with the current brain you have, but with the future brain that you are going to have. Everyone have the most incredible week and as always, please leave us a review. tag us on Instagram. If you loved this episode. If you have follow up questions for Dr. Lin. please tag me so that I can send them on over to her and maybe we'll have her on for a follow up episode. Again, my Instagram is at Jess McKinley. We know that's je s SMCKIN le y you y e n o and you can also send us a follow up question at that email at sincerely future you@gmail.com Everybody have a beautiful weekend.
Transcribed by https://otter.ai