Every CEO wants their customers and clients to feel GREAT about their business and services, but at some point, the negatives outweigh the positives. Maybe you have an exceptionally needy customer. Maybe a client wants something from you that you don’t offer. People pleasing (as we call it) is a natural part of running any business… but it’s NOT always what’s BEST for your business. I’m giving you 3 steps to dial back your people-pleasing habits.
Also listen to the end to hear how you can take control of your future by joining my next Master Class on how to be a “Masterful CEO.” It’s coming up on September 6th.
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Jessica McKinley Uyeno 0:01
Now we can chat people pleasing. While we could be here all day talking about the root of this behavior, especially for women, especially especially for women in business, we still have kind of a new history with us women in business. And I'm so glad to finally give you a guide for loving your clients caring about them, but not being at the mercy of them. Welcome to sincerely future you a podcast that helps ambitious women like you make decisions today with the future you in mind. Are you a people pleaser? And life and business is your desire to make sure everyone is satisfied costing you time and money left and right. But you just care so much, right? Tough love time darling. people pleasing is the opposite of kind. It's lying. It's saying that it's a yes, when it's a no, it's creating a relationship that you resent, rather than one of Honesty and trust. And that is not how we run a masterful business. In today's episode, we're gonna break down some of the psychology between why it's so hard to break this people pleasing habit. And you're gonna learn the three phases of giving up people pleasing altogether. I've done an episode in early days of the show, but the sound quality for some reason is atrocious. And the topic is so valuable, that people keep saying they're going back to it and I can't have it. I want to reintroduce to you this topic of letting go of people pleasing, but with some fresh examples to help you guys drop this act like that. But before we do, I got a shout out the client of the week, the client of the week this week is Neela. Neela has a couple of businesses. She is a pre and postpartum wellness coach. She also runs a graphic design business where she helps people get the full tailored IX custom experience, usually with weddings, sometimes with business branding, and she just is an all around talent. But the thing is, with all around talents is we have a million ideas. And sometimes it's really hard for us to focus in. And that's why a lot of my clients come to me to help them master before they multiply or in needless case, help them simplify and get really clear about what results they want to create in each of their offers so that they can reverse engineer it. Now Neil has been working on this this entire last March class of the masterful CEO school. But this month, I really watching her hit her stride not just in hitting some goals that she'd been working on for months in terms of reaching the amount of clients and the amount of revenue that she was working on in each of her prospective businesses. But also she is about to have a baby. And for those of you who are listening to the show, or have been listening to the show for a long time, you know that the people that I'm speaking to, you want big lives, not just big businesses, at the expense of a big life, but a big life too. And that might mean for you having a family that might mean for you starting a family, like in Neil's case, but if you're new to the show, you're going to be so excited about what she's working on, which is setting up her maternity leave, and not just figuring out how to tie things up so that everybody feels like they're good, and they have some homework and they're on hold. And all of the automated responses are on while she's away. Some of that will be happening too. But bigger than that, we wanted to think about how she could create a business that is bigger than her that runs without her while she's not even there. So she can continue to deliver the value and continue to make money. As an entrepreneur. I don't see anything out there in the world. Like what I am teaching my clients in terms of setting up maternity leave, so that you are able to continue to make money. That is a gift and we get to give it to yourselves. So shout out to Neela who's really starting to think big thinking about her brand that lives beyond her as the practitioner as the artist, as the CEO, right? CEOs are great at delegating, they understand that the value lives in the results, not in time with them. Okay, so I'm just so proud of you Neela and I can't wait to see what your business does when you are snuggling that little baby. Okay, and now it's time to get hype. Time to replace a coffee with the hype sash. I imagined this part of the show that hype sash does for your brain was seen Coca Cola logo does. Fun fact, one brain study actually showed that even without drinking it, just seeing the logo causes the brain to release the dopamine drug. So let's go skip the calories and let's get hype. Where do you get your ideas? For your products? your emails, your social media content, your podcast episodes? Where do you seek inspiration? Where do you go for answers? Who do you ask? Is it leaders in your industry? Is it your mentor? Is it Pinterest, or Tik Tok? Or other podcast books? Or is it future you? Listen, there's no need to reinvent the wheel at every turn decision. Fatigue is real and your energy is precious. But social media is beginning to turn into some giant amalgamation of oneness. There's a group think in the way that we speak the problems we're solving for the angles we speak to. Are you in your biz girl era? Does that phrase even sound familiar to you? It probably does. Because one person says something and then we're so easily influenced by it. It's in the air that we breathe. And if you're following a copy and paste guide to launching the same way, all photographers should, for example, are putting items on the menu at your restaurant that are just trending right now. Trendy references can snag attention I get it. But too much of this follow this foolproof method or use this trending audio is going to put us all to sleep. You are too rad to become a watered down version of what's already out there. The only Kool Aid I want you to be drinking is the one that future you is serving up from her Punchbowl, you have the recipe to a sparkle juice that no one has ever tasted. And if you're seeing low engagement or the same crowd coming back and no one knew, it's like your mom's just liking the posts over and over again. It's probably because you're regurgitating the same hogwash over and over. Make it weirder you masterful CEO, you masters of the biz, Queen of the serving up the goods Grand Poobah of profits capitana of the entrepreneurship, see what it means see what I mean? Here's your homework. Ask what your clients need, then tell them boldly, sweetly Sasa pensively simply, quickly, poetically, whatever your biz language style is exactly why they think they don't have the result they're looking for. And then why they don't actually already have it. Be brave, be specific. And if you get stuck picture future you in her most unbasic future life, the clothing her environment, all of the details, and speak as if you're already her, she knows exactly what to say. All right, now we can chat people pleasing. Wow, we could be here all day talking about the root of this behavior, especially for women, especially especially for women in business, we still have kind of a new history with us women in business. And I'm so glad to finally give you a guide for loving your clients caring about them, but not being at the mercy of them. As you're listening to this episode, you are practicing one of three behaviors. That for the purpose of this episode, I've organized into three phases of giving up people pleasing, phase one, people pleasing, you're just doing it. Phase two, standing up for yourself. This is when you're dropping the people pleasing, but it feels like you got your dukes up. And phase three is neutral honesty. I pre warn my clients that the process of learning most of the advanced skills of life and certainly of business are going to require you to trudge through different emotional terrains. A good example is becoming fluent in a new language is one you know nothing. Phase two, you think you know everything. Phase three, you realize you're always going to be learning and that fluency is the scale with no ceiling. It's a roller coaster. I went on it when I was becoming fluent in Spanish and right still, I'm still always learning. It can feel like a roller coaster. But don't worry, I'm going to give you a few rules today to help make the emotional ride feel purposeful instead of out of control. With people pleasing. The reason why I see most people continue to people please isn't because they're blindly unaware of their tendency to say,
Oh gee, you have to cancel. 10 minutes before our appointment. you overslept your alarm. Oh, no problem. I have other things I could do at the office anyway. You tell me what's good for you. I'm so sorry that we couldn't meet Next time I can come to you, if that's easier, are you mad at me? Just kidding, I'll just send you a full refund, don't even worry about the transaction fee. They know their MO. And if you're listening to this, that might sound like a slightly exaggerated version of you. If you're in phase one, you're people pleasing, and you probably know it. You might even think of it as a part of your identity, and make offhand jokes about how much of a people pleaser you actually are. As if you were born this way with a sucker har and N Oh, shucks, I can't help myself desire to make everyone's life easy and pleasant and negative, emotion free. But if you're a business owner, you can't afford to keep acting like this isn't a problem, because it will cost you time and money, and the ability to scale into a reliable business that your clients and team can trust. Here are some common examples of people pleasing showing up in business. Having loose or no cancellation policies, accepting payment in every form, particularly whatever the client asks how to pay, then Moselle cash, half check, have cash, get it to you a little later, having a complicated business in the form of a million products or services, because you say yes to every version of what people ask you for. And I've seen this, at the million plus level. I've seen it in industries where people are the leaders, they still think that the way to serve their clients is to give them exactly every way that they ask for things. people pleasers tend to go to great lengths to accommodate the wishes and preferences of others, sometimes to the detriment of their own well being. And in this case, in business, sometimes that looks like a team that runs you and unpredictable schedule with lots of interruptions. My people pleasing clients usually come to me saying, Oh, you don't understand scheduling, this can be really hard for me. And then they list all of these examples of ways that their schedule feels out of control to them that they've created by having no policies and no boundaries. This also might look like clients texting or calling or DMing you around the clock, a lack of accountability for your clients, if they show up, and they don't manage the expectations that you set for them. And you're just like, Okay, no problem, and you just gloss over it, and you don't set clear boundaries and expectations, they have less accountability, and therefore they're not going to get the results that you set out for them. Low levels of commitment or follow through from your clients. It might look like feeling overwhelmed and exhausted from trying to manage everyone and everything, little time truly unplugged. Or if you do unplug, it's out of necessity from burning out or quitting or having to take a break. You shouldn't have to take a break from your business, we get to create a business that looks like the business, we want it to look like holding on to products or offers that aren't profitable or aligned with your future because you don't want to disappoint one or two past clients. So you still have that offer on the table, even though it's not how you want your future business to look. The problem is, you probably kind of like the badge of people pleaser. Why? Understanding why we do what we do. It's a crucial part of breaking a cycle. So let's address it. Most people pleasers I've coached tell me in some form or another that they think that people pleasing just matches their most important core value. And that's caring. But here's the thing. Caring is not giving people exactly what they asked for delivering it in the way that they like. And in the moment they ask for it. Caring doesn't mean having no policies or boundaries. It doesn't look like saying yes, when it's actually a no, that is lying, that is enabling. And it's harmful to your relationship, whether it's with your clients, your suppliers, or your team. You're only people pleasing because you think it's the highest form of kindness and love. And for that, I love you. But you don't have to drop the kindness and the love part. I'm going to teach you exactly how to incorporate that without doing it at the expense of yourself and the integrity of your business. Good news, you can finally take the globe off of your back Atlas, okay, because people pleasing is actually a dick move. And here's an example. I've been in coaching rooms where coaches had strict policies about the expectations of showing up On calls timeliness having their camera on not being in the car, no kids in the room, no animals, no pets, right? Good sound and quality, making sure your internet is a good internet connection. And then I've also been in coaching rooms where it's no big deal. The results of no biggie is that people become more relaxed about their commitment, and begin multitasking, showing up late scheduling things for right after and being rushed or unfocused or having to be in the car to drive there. If it's a group call, it diminishes the value for everyone else, wasting time and changing the level of the value of your offer. Ultimately, it's the client that doesn't get the result that they paid for. Everyone loses. So what do you do? Number one, when you're people pleasing in your in phase one, is you're going to make decisions from your model and not other people's models. What do I mean by this? I mean that you're thinking about what do I think about the situation? What do I want to feel? And what do I want to do here? What is the result I want to create, making sure that the results is not how someone else is going to think, feel or behave. We can't control the way our clients think and feel and show up. But we have this illusion oftentimes that we can. And so we spend a lot of time trying to manipulate our clients trying to end we cloak it in the goal of making sure we have satisfied customers. And listen, I'm all about striving for 100% satisfaction of customers. But the way that I do it is deciding in advance what I think my policies are going to be around that in terms of like, for me, the policies that I've created in my business to create that same result, that same goal are I have strong onboarding and offboarding processes for my goals, I make sure that people can journal and reach me in between coaching calls, so that if they have other specific questions or concerns, I can address them, I set very clear expectations for them. And I am very selective with the people that I let in the room. So I only let people in the room who I feel like are truly ready for the program. And they are going to be able to take advantage of the tools and get the results in it. Because I have high standards for that. And I have high expectations of them. And myself and my team. And I set up policies and processes for that. When people come in, and they are feeling dissatisfied, I get to look and say Okay, does this already fallen? Do I like the way that I've shown up? Can this be added to it, but I'm not doing it from a place of wanting to please them, I'm doing it from a place of wanting to improve my process of wanting to show up. As a great business owner. It's so subtle, but it's a slight difference. When I'm thinking about being controlling the only thing I can control, which is me, my business my offer. I never do anything from the perspective of trying to control how my client is going to feel or think about me, or the action that they're going to take the end of the day. It's your clients responsibility or customer's responsibility for what they do. And we can suggest things and we can offer things and we can offer them thoughts and prompt them with things. But you are in the pool of people pleasing, if you are trying to make decisions based on what other people are going to think feel and do. Okay, so that's step one. If you're in phase one, you're going to make decisions based on what you think feel and do and not what others do. Step two,
you're going to ask does this decision feel good in my body before, during and after the decision? So in some cases, it might make sense to make exceptions with a client, you have a policy, but someone comes in they have a situation and you make an exception. I love to make an exception. And I'm always making exceptions from my value system and from the values that I feel like are important. So in some, in some cases, I'll just sit with myself and I'll say, Okay, I think this decision feels good before. It's going to feel good during the question. Should about after is I'm asking like, okay, is Am I making room for the client to respond however they want to my decision? And still am I willing to have my own back on the decision, no matter how they respond or what they do, whether they appreciate it or not. Which brings me to rule number three of your people pleasing? Ask, am I creating a no lose situation, regardless of how the client or employee or supplier shows up in their thoughts, feeling or action? So for example, let's say they don't appreciate it, let's say they asked, Oh, hey, can you can you actually do tomorrow instead of today, I had a last minute thing come up, and you move things around, and you have to get childcare, and you go there and you're like, okay, like, I'm doing this for them. And they show up a little bit late, and they don't even say thank you. Are you still able to feel really good about your decision to change that. And one way to guarantee that is that you're just deciding, deciding in advance. Okay, this is what I like to do, I like to make one exception for people per client. That is my policy, where I think that things happen. But when things happen more than once, it's usually not an exception, that means they're creating, they have a relationship, or they have a tendency, right. So I'll make an exception, of course, if I think it's appropriate, but I'm not going to enable a behavior. And even if they don't appreciate it or not, I just decide, Oh, I feel generous in my body. So I feel good before, during and after, regardless of they can just be completely unaware of how much effort it took me to move around my schedule. I don't even need to tell them, I just get to feel generous in my body and show up that way. But I'm firm and my policies, and I'm not going to people pleased to do it a second time. And I'll have good reasons for that. So step number four, if you're in people pleasing is to check in. Do you like your reasons for showing up the way that you did? I like to be a generous person. I like to make room for humanity. I have kids, they get sick. Sometimes. I you know, I'm having an off day occasionally. And I'll show up late. And I think that there should be room for human error. But even if sometimes I say okay, yeah, no problem, I'll make the change. And then they know, show me on the second time. Maybe I'll do it differently next time. But I still get to decide. I like my reasons, because I like to believe that people are generally human, and they're generally good. And as long as you like your reasons, you get to back up the action that you took, even though you get to say like, Okay, people are generally good. I love that. I believe that. And also going forward, I'm going to say that you require 24 hours notice at least so it doesn't cost me double for childcare to switch it around something like that, right? Okay. Now, let's say you've decided you're done with people pleasing, and you're moving on to phase two, or you're in phase two right now, standing up for yourself. This is the experience most people think is the alternative to people pleasing. If I want to stop, I have to start standing up for myself. I have like, if you're watching the YouTube, you can see I just keep putting my like my dukes up, right putting my hands up. But actually, this is the amateur alternative that comes from big time thought errs. Number one. People keep putting me in this situation. And that I had two people please or I had to be the bad guy, right had to put my guard up, had to defend myself. Okay, you have this thought they put you in this situation. Or number two thought error. You shouldn't have to deal with this. People tell me that all the time. My clients, you guys will tell me Oh, I just every time people will always come in, they'll ask me for something that just isn't something that I offer. It's so annoying. I shouldn't have to deal with this. And I'm like, Well, if you want clients, you're going to have to expect that humans are going to behave like humans do. And they're just going to be operating from their thoughts and their worlds kind of oblivious to the way that you are doing things. That's okay. You get to deal with this right?
Okay, so we're gonna watch out for those two red flag thoughts of someone put you in this situation, or you shouldn't have to deal with this. I love the example I had My years ago who was getting like upset every time she saw a boy scout or like a do gooder enter with a clipboard looking for donations, because she was such a people pleaser that she felt like, Ah, I hate that people keep putting me in this situation asking me to donate money. And she was either having to say no, quote, unquote, standing up for herself being the bad guy. Or she was having two people, please like those were her two options. And she felt terrible. And she wanted to donate, but she was over donating outside of the budget of what her business could afford sometimes, right. And so I thought that this was really, really interesting, because her whole focus was on that she wished other people would not show up, or in whatever case that you might be going through right now, you might wish that other people would act differently. This puts you in a situation when you are at the mercy of your business. Perfect clients and customers are going to show up confused all of the time, they're going to think it's no big deal for you to just deliver it to them, when that wasn't discussed or part of the payment. If you don't tell them otherwise, they're going to assume that it's not that big of a deal. If they're 10 minutes late, they're going to keep texting you at 10pm If you keep responding when they text at 10pm, right? When we believe it's common sense. Another thought error, or other people should act differently, we feel disempowered, we feel like the victim of our business. And therefore it the only logical solution is to stand up for yourself, right? Here's some much lovelier option available to you. And this is phase three, neutral honesty, this is the phase, I know that you can all get to. It's the phase where you meet people with clean and clear policies, boundaries and values, you are so concentrated on who you want to be in this relationship, how you want to show up as a business owner as a human being how you want to show up as a boss, in the employee employer relationship and this supplier relationship if you have one of those right, in a contracted relationship. It's all about how are you are going to think and feel and what you're going to do, and how you plan to over deliver to them. It's the simple truth without apology or guilt or resentment, just neutrality. It's the masterful way to communicate within your business, building trust at every corner. But like vases wanting to practicing neutral honesty isn't entirely exempt of you feeling terrible. Our human desire to please and satisfy at all costs is strong, especially for women, because we've been socialized in this way. But when you understand that pleasing at the expense of yourself, and your business is a surefire way to break down your relationship instead of to show that you're caring. You'll be more willing to show up in alignment with your thoughtful policies and values, instead of saying, okay, sure, why not, and then regretting it later. So how do you start practicing neutral honesty? Step one, get clear on what's true for you. What are the values of your company? What policies feel fair, amazing to deliver and still like you're over delivering. My clients who have transitioned from people pleasers into telling the honest truth have created some of the most incredible industry standards for customer service. Because giving up people pleasing doesn't mean your customer service has to go down. On the contrary, it just means that you are owning your role as the expert and CEO of delivering your value, and that you are going to guide people where they need it. Once you've gotten clear about your policies, boundaries and true desires, you can start to make decisions in integrity with the lathe and the business that you want to lead. For some of us, this is complicated work, you may have to separate desires for you from the desires of your clients, because sometimes they're not going to match and I'll give you some examples. That's okay. There is always a creative way to find a win win. So after you've decided and gotten clear on what's true for you, whether it's in your policies or your core values as a company, step two drop victim thoughts like the ones we identified in phase two, right red flag any thoughts that anyone else should be acting differently? and instead focus on what you want to think feel and do. I said that pretty simply, but I get that it's not easy. It's a big transition, focusing your brain on you, because it means you have to do something, right. It means you have to feel negative emotion and then show up anyway, you have to put your big girl pants on. Right? Okay, and it's hard. And it's challenging, and it's uncomfortable. Sometimes it doesn't feel fair. But you know, what we're adults. And the truth is, is that we'll get to be fair is that you get to create the results of your life, the experience of your life, the emotional experience of your business. And if you continue to act like other people are creating that for you, you're always going to feel a little bit out of control. So step three, step one was get clear on what's true for you. Step two is dropping the victim thoughts. And step three is staying in your model. We talked about this. In phase one, the model is your thoughts, feelings, and actions and results. But this is yours. Right? Not other people, including your clients, or staff, or what have you. Sometimes people ask, but isn't that selfish? So I want to clear that up. I'm not suggesting that you only care about you, and stop caring about them. This unfair dichotomy is what's been keeping you stuck and people pleasing. Keep your caring heart my love buckets, just show that care from your model, meaning love them from your values. Not so they will think feel or do what you want them to. That's not love. That's manipulation, you guys. Alright, so And watch out. Because I still think probably I'm trying to think of as many examples as possible, so that you can see that when you say yes to people, even if they're immediately they feel like Oh, thank you so much. So glad you did that. And you feel a little that, that hit that you thrive on the people pleaser thrives on that head of like, oh my gosh, thank
you so much couldn't have done this without your like, it's so appreciate it. Even if what ends up happening, when you're people pleasing, not when you're doing something for someone that does still feel aligned for you. Sometimes that'll happen. And that's great. That's not what we're talking about here. We're saying saying it's a yes, when it's actually a no for you, what ends up happening is you end up attracting a clientele who doesn't share the same values as you, they don't value time or timeliness. Or they don't value the product or service that you really want to offer. They have other values and that's okay, they're allowed to keep them, there's nothing wrong with them, we just need to make sure that we're very clearly attracting a team clients suppliers that will help us build the business that we want to show up to not a business that we're going to resent. Okay, so I'm gonna give you an example in terms of a model, let's say someone asks me, if I would do six weeks of coaching, instead of six months, which is what I currently offer for reasons that I love. Stage one people pleaser with think I want them to feel supported, and like I have their best interest. I mean, I could do six weeks when they think that they feel kind of wishy washy on their policies and their offer. And then from that feeling, they take the action of people pleasing and offering six weeks, the result they create is that they deliver them coaching that doesn't have their best interest or support their long term results. And often cases, this person just has a lower commitment to the coaching experience, right? Stage two, when you're in standing up for yourself. Let's say someone asks you for the six weeks of coaching, your thought is I wish people would stop trying to get me to give them something I don't do like just read my website. If you're thinking that you're going to feel annoyed and say no with an attitude or listen no and a long explanation of why not kind of shaming them for even asking, or you'll say yes and break your policy, but only this one time making it clear you're making an exception and Loki threatening them to not do it again. The result is you end up creating this like weird energy between your clients whether you said yes or no. It was from a awkward place or like an unaligned place. And the result is you end up pushing your clients away or putting a space beat between you and your clients. And then stage three, when you're in neutral honesty, and someone asks you, or asks me, let's say I'm in neutral honesty, someone asked me if I will do six weeks of coaching, when that's not my offer. My thought is, I want success for them. They're telling me that this is what they think they want. But my policy and offer is six months of coaching, because from experience, I know that that's the sweet spot for learning, implementing and making a habit of the tools that I teach so that it's sustainable for them. I feel when I'm thinking about that I'm focused about me and my policies and what I want to offer them when I'm thinking about offering them based on my values, I feel resolved, and I feel neutral, and my action, just to say No, probably not even to justify it or explain it. Sometimes I will, I'll explain if they feel really confused. But it's just like, oh, no, I only offer six months. And the result is I have a client roster of great fits only six month coaching clients who are committed and getting high quality results, I will say that sometimes the results I create in that moment is that that person doesn't sign up. Sometimes the result I create, and you'll be surprised is that the person says, okay, and then they do the six months. But you'll never know if you're continuing people pleasing, or standing up for yourself. When you get to neutral honesty, you're in an honest relationship. When someone commits, they're committed. When someone says no, it still feels good, because you know that it wasn't a fit. And so finally, I'm just going to add some useful thoughts to help you stay in stage three of neutral honesty, one of my favorite thoughts is sometimes people are going to be confused. And that's okay, people aren't going to get your policies, or they're going to think that you just aren't being fair or accommodating or something like that. If that's okay, we can make room for other people to feel whatever they feel in response to your policies. But again, and this brings me to another useful thought that I have negative emotion, their negative emotion is not a problem, or an indictment of you. When you people, please what you're subtly saying, especially if you're worried about people pleasing your kids or your family, what you're actually saying is, I don't believe that you can handle the truth, I don't believe that you can handle the experience of negative emotion. So I'm going to try and protect you from that. Truth is, there's actually nothing wrong with negative emotions, part of the human experience, sometimes, like when I was in that coaching container I was telling you about. And she was like, Hey, turn your camera on. Just point blank, she wasn't being mean, she was just holding the boundary that she had set in the room, I felt so bad, I felt uncomfortable. I felt bad. And I was like, oh, shoot, I'm not gonna do that, again. You know what it was, it helped make me accountable to the experience that I came for. She has that policy for a reason. Right? And at first, I might be like, Oh my gosh, I can't believe she just called me out. Blah, blah, blah. That's so mean or rude or whatever. But at the end of the day, those are my thoughts. And her job is to just come and get me results. So you kind of remember what is your job? What are they coming coming to you for? Are your clients and customers? Or is your team are they coming to you for for you to just be nice to them? Regardless of the truth. They're coming to you for value they're coming to you for a relationship that they can believe in that they can trust and you can only give them that when you are in this phase three of neutral honesty. Masterful CEO school enrollment is coming next week i know i the changes in the air. Can't you feel it? If you're near your arc, you definitely feel it because it's fall, and it's crisp. And that's exactly the way you feel when you are in this room. We still have a few spots left and if you're new to the show, the masterful CEO school is my six month coaching program where we meet weekly virtually and once live right in the middle of the program in January. You'll learn time, money and business tools and processes while also being given the space to work out the emotions and that messy. What am I do here situations each week. The community is unlike any I've ever seen in the industry and the transformation of going from feeling like a an employee and your own business. or really just this person that's good at this thing and is trying to scale without losing their life in the process to a masterful CEO. It's just my favorite transition to witness on this earth. I mean, maybe it would be cool to see a caterpillar turn into a butterfly like live, but I've never seen that. So this is definitely my top one. And I can't wait for you to join us get on the waitlist by going to my Instagram bio at Jess McKinley. Uyeno. Definitely come connect with me over there. Just McKinley, MC K, I NLEY. Uyeno, or you can snag it in the show notes. Enrollment is from September 12, to the 14th. And we begin the following week. Let's go. So let's recap. Phase one was people pleasing? Phase two is standing up for yourself and phase three, that magical phase of neutral honesty. Which phase are you in right now. If you sit with yourself, be honest. Whichever phase you find yourself in, though, know that if it isn't working for you, or if you feel like there's room for improvement, it's not too late to change and involve. You are not a people pleaser. That's just an identity that you've practiced. Keep the self concept of kind, caring lover, not a fighter. I love that for you and show up in neutral honesty with that same goal in mind. Not only are you growing your business, but you're also growing yourself. This would be a good time to sit back and take a deep breath. And check in to see if you fall into any of these phases and if that phase is serving you or not. If you loved this episode, please share it with someone who needs to hear it. This is one of those episodes right that just punches you in the gut if you're in phase one or two, and you might not even know how to get out of it. So share it with your girlfriend like right now texted to her. Okay, that is being a kind caring lover. Until next week, my masterful CEOs will see you that
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