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Writer's pictureJessica McKinley

124. Am I Confusing the Self-Coaching Model? (Minisode)

Updated: Mar 7

Sincerely, Future You


This ONE Question

Am I trying to out the action a bad thought? Am I hoping that by reaching my goal, I will feel better? Am I giving the circumstances of my life all the power over how I feel? Reminder - Our Circumstances just exist. What our clients say. If our employees show up.


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Jessica McKinley 00:00

circumstances, trigger thoughts, thoughts, create feelings, feelings, drive actions and actions produce your results, you'll be able to see whether you are trying to hustle or reorder the model and use it against yourself. Welcome to sincerely future you. I hipsters here is your high quality question of the day. Am I confusing the model. So my clients know exactly what this means I am referring to the self coaching model, that is something they teach at The Life Coach School. So as a review, if you have not listened to any episodes, definitely go back and review on the self coaching model. But for this purposes, right here, we're just gonna do a recap. The model is the facts of the way the world works, which is this, your circumstances just exist. And then they may trigger your thoughts, your thoughts, create your feelings, your feelings, drive your actions, and your actions produce your results. And I always like to say our actions in collaboration with universal timing or energy, produce our results, that is a little ode to the episode The let go. But the reason I wanted to bring this up, this might be an advanced, high quality question. For those of you who are new time New World listeners, but the ones that aren't. I constantly am asking this question when I'm coaching you, are you in alignment with the way that things work? These are some common errors that come up even for myself as a life coach, when I asked myself the question, Am I confusing the model? Am I trying to out action, a bad thought? So that might look like am I trying to hustle and take lots of actions towards creating clients, when the problem is actually that my thought is nobody wants to buy from me. So I'm trying to prove that people do want to buy from me by taking lots of huskily action. That's not how it works, we can never out action about that. If you believe nobody wants to buy from you, you're going to take us a reaction. And you're going to prove that thought true. And you're gonna take lots of action, and we'll carry lots of nose from your weird as action where you're being creepy and weird and apologetic while you're trying to sell people. And then you're gonna be like, See, I knew nobody wants to buy from me, you cannot out action, a bad thought. So you want to start from the beginning of the model there. Another way you might be confusing the model is, if you're hoping that by reaching your goal, you're going to feel better. This is a reminder that our results, what we earn for a living, getting married, any, anything that we would put in our goal line, our result line doesn't create our emotional human experience. So you want to make sure that you're not setting goals, with the goal of trying to create a better or out out run the 5050 human emotional experience here. Another way that this is, the model is constantly confused is by giving the circumstances of your life, all the power over how you feel. So that might look like he is just making me so mad. My clients are just don't get it. And therefore they are not buying and I feel so scarce right now. Whether your clients give you a negative review, or if your employees show up or don't show up, or if there's a new wave of COVID that hits all of those are neutral circumstances. But the good news is we get to control the rest. We want to make sure we're not leaving out the role of our thoughts and creating our feelings and giving all of our credit to what's happening around us. And also we're not confusing or reordering the model in any way. So if you write this down circumstances, trigger thoughts, thoughts, create feelings, feelings, drive actions and actions produce your results. You'll be able to see whether you are trying to hustle or reorder the model and use it against yourself.


Jessica McKinley 04:50

Okay, Happster now you have this week's high quality question and your job is to answer it, whether you're writing it down or whether You're just answering it concretely in your head. Take a moment of silence. Pause this or don't just go right to your next podcast episode. And really give your space to breathe and to think harder than you thought all week. Answer this high quality question. And don't forget to share with me what wins you have, what you notice about your past self, and how you are beginning to step into that future CEO that I have come to know and love. Because in the future, we're friends right guys? Have a great week.


Hey Happters. If you want to learn more about today's topic, head over to what's happening.com forward-slash podcasts. That's what's happening. podcast that's what's happening w-h-a-t-s-h-a-p-p-y-n-i-n-g com forward slash podcast if you're a business owner and you're resonating with what we talk about here what are you even doing come hang out with me over where the party's at on Instagram at what's happening w jets again that's happy h-a-p-p-y-n-i-n-g and book a discovery call to see if coaching is your next best step


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