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196. Healthy Social Media Relationships with Jamie Ratermann

Updated: Mar 7

Get ready for a lively chat on "Sincerely Future You" as your host, Jessica McKinley Uyeno, welcomes the vibrant Jamie Ratermann, a holistic business coach and social media maven. In this episode, they unravel the secrets of social media, from Instagram and TikTok to the emerging LinkedIn AI.

Join the duo as they redefine social media, debunking the popularity contest myth and showcasing it as a powerhouse for sharing purpose. Jamie spills the beans on the magic of "pride scrolling" and how embracing imperfections can boost confidence and courage.

Find out why social media is your canvas for authentic self-expression. This episode is your go-to guide for a healthier and more exciting relationship with social media.

Subscribe now to "Sincerely, Future You" for a dose of wisdom, humor, and practical tips on growing your business!

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*This Transcript is Autogenerated*

Jamie Ratermann 0:00

I've been releasing the a plus student since I became an entrepreneur and part of my own growth or what social media has helped me do is letting the messiness and the imperfection actually be the thing. People to come to me.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 0:16

Welcome to sincerely future you a podcast that helps ambitious women like you, and make decisions today with the future you in mind. Hello, my listeners of sincerely future you, we have a really fun guest for you today, I have been speaking with Jamie, who you're about to meet in a second, quite a bit this week. And I just have this sense. You know me if you're a listener of the show, I'm Wu adjacent, I am not like, all up in understanding the lunares and the horoscopes and the things. But when I feel something that I cannot describe in normal language, energetically, I received the magic. And since I have been introduced to Jamie, I just feel like there are some exciting things in my future like this is a relationship that will develop and a year from now future me is like up. Yep, so glad that you and Jamie connected via podcast and I cannot wait to share you with her. She is a social media expert and a holistic business coach. You know me, I do not claim to be an expert of social media whatsoever. I just love it. And I have what I think is a healthy relationship with social media. And when Jamie and I were chatting about this, we seem to share a lot of opinions about what this means what it means to have a healthy relationship with something that a lot of people out there deem to be a necessary evil. So I want to introduce you to Jamie Ratterman. And Jamie, tell us a little bit about you. And then we'll dive into talking about the social needs.

Jamie Ratermann 2:08

Oh my gosh, what a gift of an introduction. I feel like like you knew my my love language was words of affirmation. I'm just gonna like, can I just re listen to that over and over again? I love

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 2:18

it. You may. It's recorded.

Jamie Ratermann 2:21

Perfect. Thank you so much for having me on the pod. Yes, I am Jamie. I'm a Holistic business coach. I am a social media expert. I've been doing marketing and social media for over 12 years. Me I I'm like a I love the mixture. I am absolutely in the in the deep of understanding the data. I love marketing psychology. But I also know as a as a person that also as someone who's built over 50 plus brands, the brands that find a meaningful connection with their marketing are the ones that ended up going the distance, they're able to adapt to what they need to do, they're also able to ignore the things that people get scared about. So for me, when it comes to a positive relationship with social media, it's about using it as a tool to share your purpose to help people feel seen, but also to allow yourself to slowly become who you've always wanted to be. So being able to see it as yes, there's evil. So I'm not I'm not gonna spout a whole bunch of bullshit on here. But there's also a lot of positive, especially if you think about how you can use it. So I'm super excited to be here.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 3:29

Yes, yes. So, I mean, let's talk about it. When we say social media, like for me, my brain goes to Instagram, Facebook, tick tock like that's what I think of when, as a social media expert, like are there other things that you think of in this like broader category? Or just be just so that we're qualifying what we're talking about here?

Jamie Ratermann 3:51

I mean, I will say that like, I've always been a multichannel creator, where like a beginning of my business, it was I was consulting for six brands, plus brands, but so for me when social media, I'm thinking of all all of them that have some type of positive approach for your business, but also for people who are using them. So LinkedIn AI is definitely a place where people are seeing a lot of growth. I will say tick tock Youtube, Instagram is a fantastic Pinterest is a little it has leaned back a little bit. Okay, and then we'll, we'll find out what happens between x and oh my gosh, I can't even say the name, what are called Twitter, Twitter threads, and there's a new one that's coming out called blue sky which is which was Joe is like Jack Dorsey's answer to him to Twitter being completely changed. So there's there's so many new ones, but the idea is that each of them have their own rhythm and own mindset. So there's lots I wouldn't say to go on all of them but there's lots of opportunities for sure.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 4:51

I love that you use that word opportunity because that is I think the word that helps me have such a positive relationship with social me Media because I do not think of it as my only way to create revenue in my business. I do not think of it as I have to go in posts on social media at all. In fact, I don't post every day, sometimes I get in a streak where it feels lovely to post every day. And sometimes I'll go a week without posting, I'm always putting something right on my stories or anything of it. We're just talking about Instagram here. But I do think that when you think of social media as an opportunity to connect with your clients, like is that what it means? Like, what does it look like to have a healthy relationship with social media for someone who's listening? And they're like, I definitely don't have a healthy relationship with social media. I hate it. I don't even want to do it. But I feel like I have to because I'm a business owner. What would you say to that?

Jamie Ratermann 5:54

I mean, I think the biggest place to start is really going for your why why do you want to use social media? Why? Like, what would you like it to do for you? How can it be supportive to your overall growth. So for me, I was like, I'll just talk about my own personal relationship with it. When I first started posting for myself and building my own brand, the thought of going live, how I'd look like, like, there was just so much of like, oh, this wasn't getting as many likes as my friend. A lot of the things that people fall into were that one way to look at social media is a popularity contest. And it's not that it's not true in some manners and other ways. It's not. But the idea is that if I instead of go like, wait, I have a platform where I get to share what I'm about. But I want to gravitate towards more is going to be a big deal. And I think I think this kind of starts at the very top is going alright, we are sharing what we want to create in the world. By each time you post, it's a vote for, you know, what you want others to feel is an option for them, and their life. So whether that's feeling your emotions, whether that's building a beautiful business, whether that's spending time or having more rest in your life, that if you are a brand, and if you are a service provider that is wanting to deliver something positive in the world, the more that you put that out on social that we all are on hours a day, the more that someone's gonna go, like I deserve that rest, or I haven't called my mom in a while or No, like I it is possible for me to get out of debt or for whatever those options are. So the the, in my opinion, you got to start with the why and work on it's not easy to release this idea that it has to be for the likes, or it has to be for the growth, because when you start with what you're trying to create, you show up more no matter what.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 7:42

Yeah, so what I'm hearing you say, right, is that we get to not just think about showing up as social media as just like filling space and being there, but really looking at it as the opportunity to make the specific impact that we want to have on the world. And that doesn't just mean of course, it does mean selling your offer. Because that probably and should be the best way for you to add value to your people. And if it's not, right, we got to look at what's happening there. But certainly through selling, but also just through offering your values through social media, so people could start there. They could just say like, what are my values? What do I want to offer people more of whether it's self compassion, or whether it's motivation, or whether it's, you know, a, some humor, like whatever is your core values and your brands that attach to that and start showing up on social media in a way that just feels natural and fun. And like you? Yeah, salutely

Jamie Ratermann 8:48

Absolutely. And I just playing until you were kind of joking about the Whoo, and the fields, not the thing at the beginning. There's some science to this, like there's absolutely some science to that there's there's a large there was a large study done that, that people who share more than they consume, end up having, like, I think it was something like 80% of them have a more positive relationship with social media.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 9:08

I love that. I've never heard that. But that is a principle of mine. I never heard this stat. But 1,000% I would say that people are always shocked to hear how little I consume social media because of how much I share. Like, I pretty much go to social media to share a thought or share an idea or share, you know, a an offer that is happening. And then I shut it down. And then I have another idea and I'm like, oh my people need to hear this. Let's go on let's put it on there. Or, Oh, I have my schedule. Or I have my outfit so pretty. Or I just went for a run I gotta share this, right? Because part of my core values is having a big life. So therefore when I do something that feels like it's contributing to my big life, boom, I'll share it. But then if I'm not not actively pursuing my own big life, what happens is that I fall into consuming more than I'm creating. And in general, whether it's social media or whether it's something else, whether even I find some of my clients, they have this sneaky consumption that feels like it's not that bad for you are, they're consuming lots of podcasts where they're consuming books, and they're just reading lots of books, and they're consuming documentaries, all of these things in and of themselves are positive. But when that ratio flips to being consuming more than creation, something happens to our brain, where we start to feel in lack, where we start to be looking outside of ourselves, because that's where we're directing our brain outside of ourselves for how should I be doing things for oh, what is my competitor doing? Or what are my friends, they have this great life, right. And if we're not creating doesn't mean, you have to have all of your creation and social media either. But if you're not spending time creating your life more and your business more than you are consuming, I find your brain goes to a darker place.

Jamie Ratermann 11:13

Totally, totally. I mean, there's, there's an important part of how listening as a as an important place, like But if that's all you're doing, you're gonna feel like the person that's in the corner, you're not going to you're not going to feel like you're making a stamp in the world. So I think there's a sense of yet things can be positive, but your own take is worthy of being heard. And there's benefits to just how you feel their confidence. I think there's a sense of, even when we're talking about this, like sharing your purpose, I have definitely had clients walking and going. I can't say that I don't, I don't I don't want to share this, or what will people think of how this is and then we just take these small baby steps. And I mean, this is a baby and outlandish thing to say. But social media built their confidence. Social media allowed them to be on and offline a confident, courageous person, because they put it out there. Even if it got seen by 100 people, they still they did the act of letting themselves be seen by those 100 people. So I think there's such a place like I jokingly because I love biographies. When you're talking about books like I I'm a biography, girls, in general, I'm a self improvement and biography girl, I try to get into the fictions, just not all the time. This is

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 12:25

I mean, book club. I'm not reading fiction. Exactly, exactly. So

Jamie Ratermann 12:29

I keep sometimes I'll do what I call pride scrolling, like, where I'm scrolling through my own feed and being like, I'm so glad I share these things. And it's almost like the little pieces of your own biography that you get to put out online. And I think that's what's fun.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 12:44

There is so much going on this month and next month in the sincerely future you world. And so I needed to take a quick second to just let you know about some of the opportunities if you're not on my email list or following me on Instagram, you may not have heard, but we have our ninth annual coulomb ninth annual letter to future you workshop. This is the actual one day workshop that I did that inspired the entire name of my business and of my podcast. It is the people look go crazy for this workshop, because it's really all about accessing future you in a moment. And then also, being able to read this letter A year later, we're going to do it. So whether it is your first time doing this exercise, or whether you're coming back for more, make sure you do not miss at 12pm on December 31, we are going to kick off the new year, right? You know, if you're feeling like you're closing out a year that you really just want to put in an envelope and kind of put into the past all good. And if you're closing out the year strong, kudos to you either way, we want to start out that new year. And again, who cares, right? It's like a Monday, it's arbitrary, but also any opportunity we have to harness our energy and to get into that CEO mindset about our future. I'm going to take it and we're gonna run with it. So you can find the link to that at sincerely future. Or, of course in the show notes, or anywhere at my Instagram at Jess McKinley, bueno, je s s MCKINLEYU i e n o, go check it out and make sure you are registered. It is free 99. And also, before we get back to the show, I want to also make sure for those of you who know that you're already in for masterful CEO school. If you're a new listener, this is my advanced mastermind, six months where business owners come to really make sure that they level up in mastering their time, their money, and organize all of that CEO drama, pre enrollment officially starts January 8. But since this is the last round at the 6k price before it goes up to 18k, we are going to give you an opportunity to make sure you do not get your spot just snagged right out from under you. And so I've opened up a extra little link for those of you who know you're in to put down your deposit right now, you can find that link in the show notes. And for those early birds, anyone who does secure your spot in the masterful CEO school March class, I'm going to give you something better than a worm, right? early birds, we're gonna give you one of those stackable word of the year rings. If you have been watching the YouTube, you've probably seen me wear this. Oftentimes people are always asking me oh my gosh, what does that say? It is personally engraved with your Word of the Year. If you think that's cliche, maybe this isn't for you. But I promise you, my year, my word last year was sold out. And what did we do? We sold out if you need a word to just kind of slap you across the face every couple of hours. This is something that will just be a fun little Blinky bonus for you. I cannot wait to see who is in that room, whether you're pre enrolled or not. Oh, my gosh, Jamie, just one thing after the next where do I start? Okay. One thing that you said was, well, let's let's reverse it, because I'm gonna forget pride scrolling, I am stealing that term. Because before I was just like, do I just love myself maybe that maybe I love myself more than the average person. And some people call that I don't know what they call an arrogant or, or conceited it's really, to me, it's a practice of gratitude. It's like a way that I'm showing up and I'm seeing like, oh, I posted this, that client was having a success. And I'm not just posting a testimonial to get more clients like I'm posting it because I just am so present with them. This moment that my client came trusted me to be their coach and then got this result. And it's like, hell yeah, I want to share that. And when we build the habit, both ways from sharing, sharing, sharing the growth along the way, the journey where we're at where we're going, and then also are sharing. And these are the results. And these is this is where I've gotten to and this is where my clients I've gotten to people start to that really is the what people mean, when they say build know, like and trust, right? It's sharing where you're going, what your what your goals are, what's actually happening on the road there, and then sharing moments of getting there. Absolutely along the way. And then wait, what was the first thing that you said that like blew my mind,

Jamie Ratermann 17:59

that confidence built, or my clients like build confidence through social media

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 18:03

build their confidence, I almost I'm like, Oh, you need to do a whole episode on social media healing. Like, I feel like you have this kind of brand where, you know, flipped the script on what social media can be right? Like, it's not like in another life, I would do this. But I really feel like it's more for you. It's like, how can you take something that people have very strong opinions about that. People can say, you know, it's addictive and this that and the other thing, which of course, there's science to that as well. And so we want to make sure that the my easiest hack for making sure that I don't fall into the addictive tendencies or social media is to schedule so much life creating and building that I don't have the time to think too much about what people are thinking about my posts or how many people liked it. Like I literally you should not have the time to be able to over analyze what people are thinking you're too busy sharing the next thing. It's like, I just I feel like if we're talking about oversaturation, it helps you not worry about one thing being that big of a deal, like oh, that copy was kind of lackluster, but

Jamie Ratermann 19:25

I just as I say this, what am I post I just post just I think it was the one I posted yesterday I accidentally, like as spelled authoritatively with an extra a instead of an eye, and I was and I like looked at it and I think like a past version me would have been sweating like oh, what what do they think of it now? Do I make a joke or do I let it be like, just knowing that I like no one I didn't notice it and I stared at it. But if people notice, and they tell me about it, they're probably not my people that they're ready to like ridicule, ridicule, every little error, but the idea of like you're allowed to be imperfect is such as Was that is my biggest growth, I will say, I've been releasing the the a plus student, since I became an entrepreneur and part of my own growth, or what social media has helped me do is letting the messiness and the imperfection actually be the thing. People to come to me, I

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 20:18

love that. And I feel the same way about my own brand, right? It's like, I'm willing to send 100 emails and have 85 of them be like, just Okay, and, and like, not really speak to you, or have mistakes in them, and then have 15 of them. Make you be like, I need to work with this girl, that that thought that you just said in your email. Just the other day, someone sent me a response to their email that they're gonna get a tattoo of something I said, in my email, I was like, what

Jamie Ratermann 20:51

a reply, I would bolt that on my on the back of my screensaver. They liked it that they weren't attached to it.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 21:00

Guys, if you can have any goal with your social media, it should be that you put out I mean, I at the end of the year, I always do an annual report on my whole business, I put up all my stats, all my numbers, all everything. And I'm gonna be doing it again in like, two weeks. And I was looking at, like, the number of things that I put out there, the number of emails, the number of posts, the number of stories, I have all that. And I'm like, out of all of that I sent one email that someone's gonna tattoo, it was all worth it. Like how many bad things are average things that I have to say, in order to say one genius thing? Are you willing to do that much in order to have genius come out of you?

Jamie Ratermann 21:39

Well, and I argue that the okay emails were what allowed you to, you know, have the idea to be inspired to do the a plus pieces, I loved it use this kind of study that they did, they did a study for art for artists, where they had, they had one, one student where they like you have one artwork, they had to turn at the end of the quarter. And like, this is this is the only piece and then they had someone that the other group of classes or sorry, the other group of students had to do 100 pieces of artwork before the end of the quarter. And, you know, artists in the eye of the beholder by the end of the time, this skill was built to the people who did the 100 pieces of artwork versus the one who painstakingly stared out this one. I haven't I don't have children yet. But I'm like, if there be plus students or be students, I'm going to be so happy. So because I know that they're like, that's going to help them build because like the perfectionism that comes with having to be perfect is like just really consistent life, in my opinion. Do you from living the way you want to?

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 22:46

You're honestly going to make me cry, because my seven year old right now is kind of going through this a bit like he has ADHD and we are actually next week I'm recording on the podcast a a guest who is the doctor that runs this place called Brain bounce that he's going to and long story short, that episode will be for that episode. But long story short, the work that we're doing in the process of getting him evaluated and getting him the support that he needs and changing his brain functionally. And through exercises. We have put in temporarily some like the school's idea of like having some behavior charts, like little milestones that he can meet throughout the day of getting Smiley's Right. So there's like four Smiley's per day. And no, no one else in the class. I don't want to say no one, but maybe one of their kid in the class had this. And, you know, he comes out of the day and the beginning of this work when he had such a delay of his right brain. He'd be like, it's the one smiley day and then he would like, move on. And he just didn't really care. Now that we're strengthening his right brain, which is where empathy comes from. I'm seeing him register. Oh, our reactions me and his stepmom were there at pickup the other day, the same time and he was telling us that it was like two Smiley's one medium, medium, medium face. How do you call it like that like straight line smile? And then then one frowny? And he was like, I'm sorry. Okay. Are you still proud of me? That's what he said. And it was so heartbreaking because truly now I'm going to suggest to the teachers that as we have seen progress and and he's developed I think it's time to get rid of the chart because it was more about giving him some awareness of benchmarks. And you know, and now I'm like, now I could see how that type of student behavior can be super detrimental when we get into a place where the real world and social media and entrepreneurship especially the opposite is what is more useful. It's the imperfection that creates the success. It's the failure collection that creates our greatest work. Absolutely,

Jamie Ratermann 25:17

absolutely. You You take pride scrolling, I'm gonna take collecting failures, because it is such a profound piece, I loved that it was like ringing in my head since you're on the podcast. But the idea like it's just like, there's something about failure that I think I would love our generation to bring in that failure is something we should enjoy having. Because we it's lesson, it's something that allows us to be better, nobody who's been successful in their life, like or like, you know, resin grown, has done it through winning every single time has not has never done it through being perfect every single time. It is like there's too many stories of adversity, that becomes success, that we have to expunge this idea that perfection is the only way. But even more so is that I think what I've noticed with with people who are trying to release these achievement, like personalities, that type of thing, it's emotions have space there, you're allowed, like, being a human means we're allowed to be angry, happy, sad, all of them are good, all of them are good. And especially if like it's you can it can be received. So that that compassion empathy that you were talking about is, is going even to for me, like I have trouble with anger. Like I'm releasing the people pleaser of the Midwest, like I have trouble with anger, like I even if I'm like, acting a little angry at with my husband, five seconds later, I might be like, I don't mean to be angry at you. It was It wasn't new. And he was he's like, you were okay, you're fine. But it was like this, like, really understanding like, for me, like understanding that all the emotions are part of what makes us like, feel into our lives. And you know, let's say bringing this back to social media, you post something that you worked really hard on. And it doesn't do well. No, I would love for you to be able to detach from, from the results, but it's being able to go like, what did I like about that? Why am I feeling sad about it? What could I try again, without it meaning anything about your worth, or anything about what you deserve? Especially just throwing it in there? The algorithms kind of don't make a ton of sense like they used to a few years ago, try them thing again, don't let it be this thing that's like a stain on your weak?

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 27:36

Yes, yes. It's so good. I was gonna ask you that question about social media about like, okay, so if we're talking about a healthy relationship with social media, I think some people might be confused into thinking like, that means you only have positive emotions, when you think about social media, right, and that you don't experience negative emotion. On the contrary, for me, the way I define a healthy relationship means I am willing to feel all of this spectrum of human emotions, when I'm showing up to this very neutral opportunity of social media of putting things out there and connecting with my clients. Social media really just is a place where we can have access to people that we couldn't have access to, if we're just walking down our street, right? It's just like a bigger opportunity for you to connect. And if we're thinking about showing up and failing, like, what does, what does it look like to have healthy habits? In your week, when it comes to social media? Maybe people want that more specific question, right? So

Jamie Ratermann 28:47

I, the one thing that came up as you're talking about just just a little bit off topic of what you said, but that is like people get triggered by social media comparison, itis whatever that might be. And I think there's a sense of just like, if we just start there, mindset wise, if you get triggered, it usually means two things, either. That's something you desire in your life. And it's a way of going, if like, I wish I had that, in my pursuing that is that my priority being able to reflect upon that or you find somebody to be toxic, and you don't want anyone else to be influenced, aka, you're triggered because it's against your values. So usually, when I feel a triggered by a certain type of post, and it's against my values, it's like, my inner voice is going to say something back and say something, be the opposite. Let them know that you don't have to be this to be a good person, let them know that you don't have to act this way to grow. So like there's, there's a sense of like, instead of being like, Oh, I've been triggered like don't use social. How can triggers allow you to realize what you want. So I think there's a sense of first and foremost, let's reset or shift this concept of being triggered when you're on social media, too. what it truly is. Now, as far as good habits, I think there's a sense of, we've already talked about it a few times. We're not posting to post we're not posting to get likes, we want to start from the core of what is our values? What would we like our brand to be associated with? Like just thinking about the core? And then these are usually adjectives, not Oh, education, like, yeah, everyone wants to be educated, great. But like, would you want to be associated with compassion? Like we've been talking free? Wealth? So taking a step back and going, what am I representing even to like this, this plays out on social but also like, what would you like to what kind of energy? What do you like to emanate amongst your friends? So before we even get into, like, posting habits, different things is going, Who who are you becoming? And how can you use social to represent that first?

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 30:50

Yeah, it's kind of like we say social media. And then we totally forget the point of it. Like, we just think of it as our experience of it, which is like, being on our phone, going in clicking onto an app, seeing our face, seeing other people's lives. And right and like, we forget why we came there in the first place. Totally, and what the purpose is for it. So like, in terms of that, do you have any strategic or logistical like absolute no no's for to help people if they are in a, like in that addiction state? If they are already, they've created that like bad relationship with social media? How do they begin to heal from a like, yeah, action standpoint? Totally. It was we talked about the mindset. Totally.

Jamie Ratermann 31:43

So okay, let's, let's be clear, engineers are keeping us on there. Where were you like I'm talking about science and how to feel good. The other end of the spectrum is Facebook is spending tons of money on engineers to keep you on there as long as possible, because they make money that way. So I like to take it off the human. And let's use engineers to help us. So there's actually an app that I love called One sec, that is, was built by a retired social media engineer, to make sure that you have hard blocks before you walk into the social media app. And you can set your terms of when you're done with it. Now I know many of you are like, Oh, I put those only an hour on Instagram, and then I just ignore it and move on. Yeah. This is what happens. Whenever I walk into Instagram, it makes me take a deep breath. It makes me choose why I'm going in there. And then I can decide that I have a hard block, aka I've got to like, do a whole bunch of things to get around it. If I want to keep going into it. 15 minutes, 30 minutes, 45 minutes, I've, this has got to be the number one thing for me, I will admit i There were days, I spent five hours on social media and I used to use excuse like it's research. Yeah,

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 32:53

right. And it's so easy to scroll and just be like, I'm working Baybars of course,

Jamie Ratermann 32:59

but in my opinion, like, Well, why why try to fight like our biological needs that engineers are using? Have this piece. Now. I know there's some small cost to it. But I'm telling you, I went from like six hours a day down to like an hour and a half. It is it absolutely stopped at one of my other friends who love social media, too. She goes, Are you sick of that yet? And I'm like, No, it's just a part of my routine. And I just don't use it that way. So one, one sec, those spelled out, o n e s, e c download it, you end up just putting these blocks on things. And it will it like there's been times where I'm like scrolling tic tock and they like you're done for the day. And I'm like, wow, like it feels like a little more time. But then I then it has all these reasons. This is why you said you would like this is your time and then you get back into your real life. Yeah, there's, I would definitely say, yes. We can talk about habits that you can put into place. Let's just have engineers fight it out. Let's let's let them fight it out a little bit.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 33:57

Right. I totally agree. For me, I'm always reminding my clients to it's like, you have two options. When you have some something that you don't like going on, you can either change your thought, or you can change the circumstance. And sometimes it's like I'm like, find the thing that's going to serve you the most sometimes I'm going to season where it is more beneficial to me to like work on my mindset and detach from, like, actively work on detaching from my relationship with social media or detaching from my need to hit a goal or whatever it is. And then sometimes it's most beneficial for me to download an app and be like, okay, just force me off so that I can build the habit more naturally in a way that our brain already works. Like, everything doesn't have to be so hard.

Jamie Ratermann 34:49

It's about environment and the end of the day, like it's like the mindset is like helps you with willpower and it helps you kind of think through what you want to like who you are and it's it's it's the Important, always important, but sometimes you just need to create a system so that you don't have to reflect on what you want to do. Just let the system flow with you. We talked about this on the limitless pie, but it's like having the structure that lets you feel free. This allows me to feel free. I don't feel I don't have those miserable days going, did I just scrolled For how many hours? I didn't have to push myself off, but something else helped me like, like, allow yourself to be held?

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 35:25

Yes, 1,000%. I'm all for making a decision one time that then makes me not have to think opt out of thinking for a long time. This is like, I'm always looking for hacks like this. I'm like, okay, that's why I agreed with my husband to do this 12 K's of Christmas, I was telling you like, I'm doing it today was 12k. Right? I've done 6k So far, and it was cold. I had my daughter, she started crying. So we had to go back to so we didn't have I'm going to do that other app later. But the reason I agreed to it, because I was like, Oh, that's so easy. I don't have to wake up and think like, what should I do for my workout today? Should I work out today? Or should I work out tomorrow? I was like, I know for the next 12 days already? Exactly what I'm doing, how much I'm doing when I'm doing it? If I'm doing it? I know. I don't even have to think about it. I could just show up and do it.

Jamie Ratermann 36:16

Yeah, ultimately, us shoot, like having to make so many extra choices or like we believe we're going to have the willpower is is a continuously failing process. Like we make too many decisions all day. Yeah, it's it's we're not computers. We never, never will be, thankfully. And there's this the sense of like, why make it tougher on you give yourself a little love by letting it be easier with support?

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 36:41

Yes, yes, I agree. So, I mean, again, Jamie, I feel like I can talk to you forever about all of the things sometimes I'm like is email social media, we're talking about email, but who cares? Everyone needs to hear exactly everything that we're talking about. Right?

Jamie Ratermann 36:56

Yeah, that's a marketing channel. Let's just say marketing channels in general. All of this can feel similar. It's totally fine. Yes.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 37:01

Yes. And your healthy relationship? I? I'm going to I want to just call her Dr. Jamie Dr. Jamie today she's helping us heal our relationship scope

Jamie Ratermann 37:11

or should I get like a little like chair? I don't know which

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 37:14

kind of doctor you like horn rimmed glasses.

Jamie Ratermann 37:18

The glass white coat. You're not like I'll totally doesn't I'm not a white coat. No. I'm like the girl, the doctor with the zany glasses go like she had artists. Doctor. You have to make the choice? We'll find

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 37:32

out. Yes, yes, it remains to be seen Tune in again next week. And speaking of No, thank you so much for helping us just like, find some really easy ways for us to flip our perspective on social media, which ultimately will help us change our relationship with social media. Because I just believe if you are not using social media, in your business, you are missing out on knowing another level of yourself, you are missing out on connecting with a number of clients that you could never ever, ever reach if you tried to do it, you know, all off of social media. So I'm so grateful for you and for your wisdom. If people want more of this info if they want more of how to keep doing the healing work. Where do they find you?

Jamie Ratermann 38:24

Well come hang out with me over on the limitless podcast I talk about this stuff all the time. I also give you a link to if you guys are thinking about your content. Take a look. I put it I gave I give Jessica link. If you want to do three steps to 30 days of content. It has a lot of these questions to think about like where are you going to start before you start putting out content that can be really helpful. But of course, you can always find me over on the gram at Jamie Ratterman J am i e r a t e r ma N N? I love the DMS come talk to me Come say hi.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 38:55

Yes, Jamie is like me, we answer our DMS. Personally, we are never like, who are you? You're just some random stranger. Like we're all random strangers until we have a conversation and get to know each other. So go and check out Jamie's stuff. She's just like a wealth of knowledge. I really have already learned so much. And just our very brief three conversations that we've had together. So thank you for coming on the show. And if you guys are loving this episode, please let us know. Go onto the podcast and leave a review. Let us know be like Jamie and Jess. I can't get enough of this conversation so that we can shout you out on the show. And really you have no idea how much it means to us to not just be like sitting in our living rooms in our office respectively being like, who's listening to this? Who cares about this conversation? What is the after effect of this conversation? We love to hear it. So thank you guys in advance and thank you so much, Jamie.

Jamie Ratermann 39:59

Thank you so Much has been a true joy to meet you, and also gets to talk a lot. So my pleasure.

Jessica McKinley Uyeno 40:07

It is time to shout out the client of the week who is Kate. Kate has been a one on one client for over a year now. And as we are we're finishing the year, this morning, I actually received a notification in my inbox that I had gotten money in my Starbucks account. And I was like, what what's happening? Is the auto pay rate reopening without my permission. No, it was my client Kate sending me a bunch of tries because she knows I'm a chai addict saying thank you so much. I'm feeling so confident and strong, ending the year and she freaking should. She was honored on a global recognition call for a large corporation. And if I named it, you would know it. She received an award not just for her team, which was the recognition but for her in particular that's very prestigious within her global company. And she was selected to speak in the UK on a panel within her industry. And this woman has four children. You guys, come on. This is a big life big business chasing a woman. She is beginning to see obstacles from a mile away. And then I watch her solve for them before the obstacle even gets there. It's kind of like that video game asteroids where you kind of see the bullets coming in. You're like, Okay, I just need to attack the bullet before it gets to me right? Like she is also a nurse firing and she's doing it in a way that is imperfect. And that is what makes it so freakin badass. She's like whatever failure I need to collect whatever feeling I need to feel K I am so beyond proud of you. Thank you for being an example of what's possible for this community at this shout out just fired you up. Get ready, because there's more come in next week. Are you guys not just in love with that Jamie Ratterman I really am telling you there's something magical about her and the way that she talks about a topic like social media, which makes some of us want to fall asleep. It just, it's really healing. She has a new perspective. And I hope that you took away something that you can not only put in your pocket in terms of your thoughts about social media, but we had some really, really actionable tips for you in there as well. Please go and leave a review. If you loved this episode, you can review on Apple podcasts. It really means the world to us over here. And also make sure that you connect with her over on Instagram. We'll see you next week.

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